#575...kicking you in the ass...

....well someone has to do it.

okay peoples listen up.

this is not a request - it is an order - It is a queenly (if you know what's good for you) kinda order.

I want you to rent a movie.

(or go see it if it is still playing in your area.)

and then I want you to gather around every one that you know, and watch this movie together.

(and if you're a loser and have no friends - then watch it alone.)

and then tell them to do the same.

and to keep spreading the word.

in every way they know how.

and then I want you to turn off all unnecessary lights,

at home, and especially at work,

and change to energy efficient lightbulbs.

and to drive less, and more efficiently.

and plant a tree, no....plant two trees.

and recycle.

really recycle.

everything that you can.

and then write a letter to your congressperson.

and if you can't think on what to say - write me, and I'll let you copy mine.

because I'm generous like that.

But after seeing this movie - I don't think you will have any trouble writing what you need to say-

because you will feel everything that needs to be said,

right in the middle of your gut and inside your head. 

Which movie you ask?

"An Inconvenient Truth" - hosted by Al Gore

(and damn if he ever runs again - he has my vote.)

and no, it is not a Gore thing -

it is a MORAL thing.

and we need to do what is right.

and good for our children.

and no, there is no more room  for argument.

or excuses.

thanks, I know I can count on you.

now shoo.

(~will someone please enter this into the official log?)

www.climatecrisis.net

 

 

#574...A New Year, A New Entry, and New Resolutions

Well, will ya look at that.

Another fun-filled holiday under my belt and a brand spankin New Year to find trouble to get into.

Oh sure, oh sure - I'm gonna be good.

I gonna eat healthy,and exercise more, and lose weight for my nieces wedding, and give all my money to my kids, and ask my husband for his money, and love harder, and be nicer, and call my 84 yr old Dad more, and iron clothes, and clean out the garden, (and the refrigerator), and bead fabulous new stuff, and grow the business, and blog more, and while no one else is looking - solve all the world issues, cure cancer, the environment, and save the world from us (we?) humans.

Yeah, yeah, it's a big ticket and 365, no 4...days is not a lot of time I know.... but what the hell.

We all have to shoot for something...

Why not the stars?

We only go round once in this life yous people.  "Why not get to living while you're at it."

~Happy New Year 2007!  Toodles.

~moi.

www.believablebalderdash.com

www.mainlinebeadsociety.org

 

#573...Merry Christmas 2006

and so the eve has passed, and a new Christmas dawns...

and in the moment, one delicious moment, those at hand's reach and heart's reach,

i think on you.

 

thank you for the memories, and the delights, and the ways that you've enriched my life...

with a kiss and a whisper

                                                                             Merry Christmas.

 

(...by sun and candlelight)

 

 

righto - back to work I go.

#572...the eve of the eve

well, it's the eve of the eve...

and I should really post something.

and will.

when something comes to me.

 

hey...

#571 - on solving the immigration issue.

okay, I cannot take credit for this idea - it was forwarded along to me in an email but I like it.

a lot.

A win, win, win solution on solving the Immigration issue:

1.  Dig a moat the length of the Mexican border.

2. Take the dirt, raise the levies in New Orleans.

3. And put those troublesome Florida alligators in the moat.

Are there any other problems you would like for me to solve?

~Yeah, why aren't you (whoever you are) - running for president?

 

#570... because i like seedy places

Newsflash:  AOLHELL's real estate just got cheaper. 

cheaper than albert's frilly cape even. 

so cheap...in fact,

that it's absolutely free now.

so now, I have no problem taking advantage of filling up their server space with unnecessary stuff.

so here goes:

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Here ye!  Here ye! One and All:

The Freely Floralilian Journal of Pointless Posting is hereby re-opened for pointless business...

On occasion, that is.  (because she is still a busy Queen, doncha know.)

 

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

 

"Why Flora?" some of you might ask - 

Well, it's simply because it's one less password I need to remember.

- don't flatter yourself into thinking anything else, AOL.

 

oh, and happy third blog birthday to me too. thanks for reminding me Connie!

#569..from boobies to beetle orgies

So the damn japanese beetles are chewing on my Crepe Myrtle and Flowering Plum - leaving lacy remnants of what used to be leaves. 

And all the while having orgies - those "in your face" orgies on top of orgies on top of orgies of shameless sex - humping and thumping and swapping and chewing and grinding and buzzing and flying into walls and into my hair and down my shirt...

Enough! There is something decidedly creepy about having to retrieve a fresh from sex beetle from between my cleavage - traumatizing even - Enough I say!

And so I went out and bought some beetle bags - those "Japaneze beetle traps"..deciding against sprays and pesticides - deciding to go the humane way and collect those pesty creatures, save the environment, play fire against fire with a tiny potent sex lure......only to find them full to the brim, spilling humping little shiny green beetles over the rims in less than 24 hours.

The green bags bulged with the squirming humping beetles meeting their demise under the shear weight of the orgies on top of them - dropping in one, after the other, after the other - all frantically searching for the "sex " they have so eagerly detected.  Add to it the 97 degree sun constantly beating on the pulsating humpers and soon I have a bulging bag of slowly saute-ing humpers getting that one last pathetic and futile hump in.

I feel bad. 

Kinda, sorta. 

To see the rippling, squirming, bulging bag, and then seeing a few of them trying to wiggle out of the three air holes on the bottom; trying to wiggle free of the pressing weight, and the suffocation, and the heat...and almost, just almost, hear the tiny whispered screams of ...."helllllp me.....helllllp me...." from their little mandible faces with little hooked arms outstretched..

I ponder the distress calls briefly - letting a small amount of guilt seep into me for inflicting such pain and suffering on the little horny creatures...worse probably than a few sprays of Japaneze Beetle Pesticide....

 

nah.

 

 

"Die! You little bastards! Die!" I say and cackle hysterically in the face of their torture.

 

I think I need to stop watching CNN.